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“God is liefde,” sê 1 Joh. 4:8. Dis ‘n stelling waaroor ek al lank wonder. Dis ‘n ontologiese stelling, wat iets sê oor die wese van God en oor die werklikheid. Dit is ‘n openbaring, omdat dit ons iets wys van Wie God is. Maar dis ook ‘n geheimenis, want wat is liefde, en wat word bedoel daarmee dat God liefde is?
Ons stel dikwels liefde gelyk met ‘n emosie. Ons sê byvoorbeeld “Ek is ver-lief,” wat ‘n kort manier is om te sê dat ek ‘n oormaat positiewe emosie voel vir die geliefde, en dat daardie positiewe emosie iets te make het met liefde. Die Engelse laat die onderrok beter uithang wanneer hulle sê, “I am in love,” “Ek is in liefde,” wanneer hulle bedoel dat hulle sterk emosies van aangetrokkenheid voel tot iemand. Die gevoel van liefde, sê die segswyse, is liefde.
Nou weet almal van ons wat al ‘n slag om daardie blok was, dat verliefdheid nie liefde is nie – dis maar ‘n vorm van begeerte.
Maar dat liefde wel dikwels gevoelens betrek, weet enige-iemand wat al hulle eie baba vasgehou het. Jy kyk en ruik en voel die lyfie en weet instinktief dat dit wat in jou arms lê, onherroeplik deel is van jou wese en bestaan, op maniere wat jy nie onder woorde kan bring nie.
Soms sê ons dat liefde ‘n daad is, waarmee ons bedoel dat die emosies nie die belangrikste is nie, want liefde wat nie tot dade kom nie, beteken niks.
Nou het liefde natuurlik ook ‘n gevoelskomponent, selfs al kan mens dit nie mooi beskryf nie, en liefde kom natuurlik tot uiting in dade. Maar as mens bietjie nadink besef jy dat gevoel en dade alleen nie liefde omvat nie. Want wat God voel en doen is nie die geheel van sy wese nie, en ook nie van ons wese nie. As ek lê en slaap of in ‘n koma verkeer, voel ek nie en doen ek nie, maar dit beteken nie dat ek ophou om te bestaan nie. Dit wat ek in liefde voel en doen – en selfs dit wat ek dink en sê – is nie die omvang van my liefde nie.
Maar wat dan? Die verstommende is dat ons gemaak is om liefde te wees, nie net liefde te voel of te doen – of selfs te praat en te dink – nie. Liefde is wie ons is. Ons is gemaak om saam met God te kan sê “Ek is liefde.” Ons is daarom nie mense wat kies om lief te hê nie; ons is liefde wat kies om mense te wees.
Die negatiewe kant hiervan is dat dit wat nie in liefde is nie, nie deel is van ons ware bestaan nie, sodat enige keuse wat nie in en deur liefde gemaak word nie, ons bestaan aantas en verminder. Ons word minder mens, ons bestaan minder, as ons nie liefhet nie. Paulus sê iets hiervan in 1 Kor. 13:2:
“En al sou ek die gawe van profesie hê en al die geheimenisse weet en al die kennis, en al sou ek al die geloof hê, sodat ek berge kon versit, en ek het nie die liefde nie, dan sou ek niks wees nie.”
Ons leef weer in ‘n gnostiese tyd, waarin ons die leuen verkoop word dat kennis ons sal red – as jy ‘n wonderlike loopbaan wil hê, sterk en maer wil wees, baie geld wil hê, of op welke ander manier ook al gelukkig en vervuld wil wees, of selfs ‘n goeie Ortodokse Christen wil wees, koop ‘n boek of ‘n program wat jou sal vertel hoe om dit te doen, of as jy nie geld het daarvoor nie, kyk ‘n paar Youtube videos.
Maar 1 Kor 13 sê dat jy al die geheimenisse kan weet en al die kennis kan hê, en selfs al die geloof kan hê, maar as jy nie die liefde het nie, sal jy nie bestaan nie – jy sal niks wees nie.
Die omgekeerde hiervan is ook waar. 1 Johannes 7 sê: “Geliefdes, laat ons mekaar liefhê; want die liefde is uit God, en elkeen wat liefhet, is uit God gebore en ken God.”
Wat word hiermee bedoel? Ons – ek en jy – is gemaak uit liefde. Ons het ons bestaan te danke aan liefde. Ons is deur God uit liefde gewil tot bestaan. En toe ons geval het, toe ons die weg van nie-bestaan ingeslaan het, toe het God sy aard kom toon. Want “Groter liefde het niemand as dit nie, dat iemand sy lewe vir sy vriende gee,” het die Godmens vir sy vriende gesê in die nag voordat Hy heengegaan het en sy lewe vir sy vriende afgelê het. En met watter doel?
“Hierin is die liefde van God tot ons geopenbaar, dat God sy eniggebore Seun in die wêreld gestuur het, sodat ons deur Hom kan lewe.” en
“Want so lief het God die wêreld gehad dat Hy sy eniggebore Seun gegee het, sodat elkeen wat in Hom glo, nie verlore mag gaan nie, maar die ewige lewe kan hê.”
En wat is hierdie ewige lewe? Johannes 17:3: “En dit is die ewige lewe, dat hulle U ken, die enige waaragtige God, en Jesus Christus wat U gestuur het.”
Hierdie kennis is nie die kennis van die wêreld, wat op ‘n afstand staan en iets bestudeer nie. Hierdie kennis is nader aan die kennis tussen ‘n man en ‘n vrou wanneer hulle een word, wanneer hulle hul wese, hulle bestaan, met mekaar deel; of die kennis tussen ‘n moeder en haar kind, wat alle verstand te bowe gaan. Om God te ken beteken daarom dat ons deel het aan sy wese, wat lewe is en liefde.
En daarmee is ons eensklaps by teose, wat beteken om God te ken en die ewige lewe te hê, deur in God se aard te deel.
Hoe weet jy dat jy ‘n sinvolle lewe lei? Hoe weet jy wat die wil van God is? Hoe weet jy dat jy op pad is na die ewige lewe saam met God?
Dié vrae word almal beantwoord in twee stellings, albei uit 1 Joh. 4, wat twee kante van dieselfde munt is: “Hy wat nie liefhet nie, het God nie geken nie, want God is liefde.” En: “As ons mekaar liefhet, bly God in ons en het sy liefde in ons volmaak geword.” Dit is hoekom die Heilige Silouan sê, “My broer is my lewe.”
Het ek my naaste nie lief nie? Dan leef ek nie sinvol nie, dan doen ek nie die wil van God nie, dan is ek op die pad na nie-bestaan. As jy weer wonder waaroor om te bieg, onthou dié vraag: Het ek my broer, wat my lewe is, liefgehad soos ek kon, of nie? Dis eintlik die enigste sonde.
Maar: Het ek my naaste lief? Leef ek asof jy my lewe is? Dan leef ek sinvol, dan doen ek die wil van God, dan is ek op pad na die ewige lewe. En dan sal ek uiteindelik ook kan sê: “Ek is liefde, soos God liefde is.”
Watter onuitspreeklike, onbegryplike, onsienlike, ondeurgrondelik liefdevolle God dien ons nie! Die Heilige Gregorius van Nyssa het gesê “die ware visie van die Een wat ons soek bestaan hieruit: in nie sien nie, in die bewustheid dat ons doel alle kennis te bowe gaan.” Aan Hom al die lof en die eer en die aanbidding, nou en altyd en tot in ewigheid. Amen.
God is love and I am love
“God is love,” says 1 John 4:8.
It’s a statement I’ve pondered for a long time. It’s an ontological statement — one that speaks about the essence of God and about reality itself. It is a revelation because it shows us something of Who God is. But it is also a mystery — for what is love, and what does it mean to say that God is love?
We often equate love with an emotion. For example, we say “I’m in love,” which is a shorthand way of saying that I feel an overwhelming positive emotion for someone, and that this positive emotion has something to do with love. According to the saying, the feeling of love is love.
Now, anyone who has been around that block a few times knows that infatuation isn’t love — it’s a form of desire.
But anyone who has held their own baby knows that love does often involve feelings. You look at, smell, and feel that little body and instinctively know that what lies in your arms is irrevocably part of your being and existence in ways you cannot put into words.
Sometimes we say that love is an action — by which we mean that emotions aren’t the most important thing, because love that doesn’t result in action means nothing.
Now love certainly has an emotional component, even if it can’t be precisely described, and love naturally finds expression in deeds. But if you think a bit deeper, you realize that neither feeling nor action alone fully encompasses love.
Because what God feels and does is not the totality of His being — and neither is it the totality of ours.
If I am lying asleep or in a coma, I neither feel nor do anything, but that doesn’t mean I cease to exist.
What I feel and do in love — and even what I think and say — is not the full extent of my love.
But what then?
The astonishing truth is that we are made to be love — not merely to feel or do love, or even to think or speak love. Love is who we are. We were made to be able to say with God, “I am love.”
We are therefore not human beings who choose to love — we are love that chooses to be human beings.
The negative side of this is that whatever is not in love is not part of our true being, so that any choice not made in and through love harms and diminishes our existence. We become less human, we exist less, if we do not love.
Paul says something about this in 1 Corinthians 13:2:
“And if I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.”
We live again in a Gnostic age — where we are sold the lie that knowledge will save us: If you want a brilliant career, or to be fit and slim, or to have lots of money, or to be happy and fulfilled in any way — or even to be a good Orthodox Christian — buy a book or a program that tells you how to do it. Or, if you can’t afford that, just watch a few YouTube videos.
But 1 Corinthians 13 says you can know all mysteries and have all knowledge, and even all faith, and still — without love — you will not exist. You will be nothing.
The opposite is also true. 1 John 4:7 says: “Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God, and everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.”
What does this mean?
We — you and I — are made out of love. We owe our very existence to love.
We were willed into being by God through love. And when we fell — when we turned down the road of non-being — God showed us His true nature.
For “Greater love has no one than this, than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends,” said the God-man to His friends on the night before He went out and gave His life for them.
And to what end?
“This is how God’s love was revealed among us: God sent His one and only Son into the world so that we might live through Him.”
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.”
And what is this eternal life?
John 17:3: “Now this is eternal life: that they know You, the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom You have sent.”
This knowledge is not the world’s kind of knowledge, standing at a distance to study something. This knowledge is closer to that between a man and a woman when they become one, when they share their being — their existence — with each other. Or the knowledge between a mother and her child, which surpasses all understanding.
To know God therefore means to share in His being — which is life, and which is love. And with that, we arrive at once at theosis: to know God and have eternal life by partaking in his nature.
How do you know that your life is meaningful?
How do you know what the will of God is?
How do you know that you are on the path to eternal life with God?
All of these questions are answered in two statements, both from 1 John 4 — and two sides of the same coin:
“Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”
And: “If we love one another, God abides in us, and His love is perfected in us.” This is why Saint Silouan said, “My brother is my life.”
Do I not love my neighbor? Then I am not living meaningfully; I am not doing the will of God; and I am on the path to non-being.
And if ever you wonder what sins to confess, remember this question: Did I love my brother, who is my life, as I could have? For that is, in the end, the summary of all sin.
On the other hand, do I love my neighbor? Do I live as though you are my life?
Then I live meaningfully. Then I do the will of God. Then I am on the path to eternal life. And then I will eventually also be able to say, “I am love, as God is love.”
What an unspeakable, incomprehensible, unseen, unfathomably loving God we serve!
Saint Gregory of Nyssa said, “The true vision of the One we seek consists in this: in not seeing, in the awareness that our goal surpasses all knowledge.”
To Him be all the glory and honor and worship, now and always and unto the ages of ages. Amen.